09/07/2026
Memoir Behind-the-Scenes
Making the Villain Human: I added a scene in which my ex-husband builds a playhouse.
My beta reader said he felt 'one-dimensional—more like an offense pattern than a person.'
That review stung and was difficult to read, but they were right.
In my first draft, he was just: alcoholic, abusive, dangerous. Which was true. But not complete; there was much more to him that I left out: reasons I stayed, reasons I loved him, so I delved deeper and added more.
And I remembered: He built the kids a playhouse. He sanded every board smooth so they wouldn't get splinters. I watched from the kitchen window, feeling that pull and hoping this version of him was real.
By evening, he'd be drunk again. But the playhouse was still there.
Adding this scene doesn't excuse anything. It actually makes the abuse MORE devastating. Because it shows why I stayed. Why it was so hard to leave. Why I kept hoping.
Complexity isn't the same as forgiveness. It's just... the truth.
This was a particularly difficult chapter to write. I had to revisit memories from decades ago that seemed to belong to another lifetime or a different person. I wanted to close my laptop and give up. Is writing my memoir worth going back in time to relate the experiences? After taking several breaks, sitting on my balcony with a cup of tea, I decided to continue.
Have you ever struggled to show the full picture of someone who hurt you?
With love
Aadya Francine
