08/03/2022
It's been a whole year since I pledged to challenge the shame attached to women for being sexual for themselves and not for others.
I don't think any of us would realise on that day how much worse it could get. I'm also equally sure that non of us were surprised.
I have spent the year challenging men who still don't understand the impact the patriarchy has on everyone and I have had my fair share of days when the hate has been overwhelming. To top it all, the government and the police in the UK have made it abundantly clear that they prefer a misogynistic country where they are free to do as they please. Where preserving statues is more important than the safety of women.
I posted the pledge before I knew about Sarah, Bibaa and Nicole, Sabina and so many more women whose murders are so disgracefully seen as preventable if only they took better precautions. After months of posts about comparing women to expensive cars or someone's mother etc. the message still isn't getting through that we are in fact, human beings.
We are not objects and our relationship to a man doesn't determine whether we live or die.
I was at the point of giving up when I received a dm from a woman with 100k+ followers thanking me for speaking up on her post when she had kept quiet. (I had assumed it was because she was busy) She told me she couldn't always reply to these comments as at times it was detrimental to her mental wellbeing. It was then that I realised that it's not just the men who objectify and sexualise women that see these posts. Our male allies and women who struggle to be heard see them too. It gave me the strength to continue, not just to try and educate the kind of people who don't listen, but more often to help those who need that support. To see that they aren't alone.
This year IWD is all about breaking the bias that women face. I have learned so much and continue to learn a lot about what all women struggle with, and it is helping me be a better intersectional feminist. I want everyone to feel they can be celebrated so that we can all shine together.
I want my work to reflect the diverse world around me and I'm still a long way off and it's possible that not everyone will want me to help them in their journey which is why I always try to recommend them to someone who can. There is plenty of room for all of us. Breaking the bias is a continuation of my mission to put the spotlight on people and especially women who face stereotypes that seek to suppress them.
