06/08/2026
I thought breastfeeding would be easy. It was the one part of motherhood I didn't give a second thought to when I was pregnant; everything else, I researched beyond belief. But when my first daughter was born, the pain I experienced feeding her was comparable to giving birth without pain relief. I was in tears every time I fed her, hallucinating because I was so tired, worried because she wasn't gaining weight, and I dreaded every feed.
She wasn't gaining weight, so I power pumped, I triple fed (breast, bottle, pump at every feed), saw a lactation consultant, I was up all hours doing everything to try and increase my milk supply, all while looking after a newborn. After 3 months, we had to introduce formula and I was heartbroken. Eventually, I came to accept that it wasn't a failure of mine, and formula is a life-saving tool that we are lucky to have. I didn't give up, and even though she continued to have formula, I breastfed my her until she was 2 and a half.
I hoped the second time would be easier, but we had the same problems. But it was easier in a way, as I knew what support to ask for, and I wasn't so hard on myself. I asked for an infant feeding team referral while I was pregnant, used ni**le shields and silver cups (absolute godsend!), and saw a lactation consultant much earlier on. I triple fed for 11 long weeks, and my supply still didn't increase enough. But I'm glad I did it, because I know I literally couldn't have done any more. 7 months in and we are still happily breast and bottle feeding, and I hope to continue for as long as she wants to.
Well done if you got this far 😅 All this to say, our bodies are incredible, even if they can't do everything we want them to, and we should celebrate them more. I spent the first 26 years of my life hating and punishing my body for the way it looked, and I will spend the rest of my life knowing how stupid that was.
Whether you tried breastfeeding or not, carried a baby or not, your body is amazing. Let's all be kinder to ourselves, and a bit louder about what we're proud of ✨️ Also, take the photos - they'll be so special to you one day ❤️
