Used in trauma's

Used in trauma's Rants.

26/05/2023

Everything feels heavy

26/05/2023

you thought im doing just fine. but mother, i am not. you thought the only hardships i face is the loads of school works and how to pass them on time.

you dont have any idea how i struggle to lift myself up every passing day not because i was indolent, but because the idea of waking up and doing the same cycle again without progress makes me want to stay asleep forever.

you have no idea how these eyes of mine tend to water for unknown reasons. reasons that i cant word out because even i dont know what exactly am i feeling

you dont how much i wish for it to get dark already so i can freely burst out without interruptions. you dont know how i hate myself for countless of reason.

please check on you daughter, for i can't find any more strength to fight with these battles that life throws at me.

-anne
Cttro.

26/05/2023

my dearest family‚ how i wish i have the courage to tell you how hurt i am everytime you insult me. how i wish i have the courage to tell you that i’m breaking everytime you remove my rights to speak up. that you always make me feel invalidated. that you made me traumatized. that you ruined the whole me. that you always make me feel useless and worthless.

i love you. i really do. but sometimes you’re just too much for me. when will i feel that i’m also part of you? when will i feel that i am loved? if you always hurt me. if you always break me. if you always show hatred towards me. but yes‚ i am still hoping. i am. that someday‚ you’ll treat me the way parents love their daughter. the way siblings love their sister. yes‚ i am still hoping that someday‚ i’d be loved and valued by you.

— anne
Cttro.

26/05/2023

it's almost night time. the entity of sadness is knocking on my door again. and as much as i wanted to keep the door closed; i knew i had to open it. for it's the only way I'd be able to free myself from the sorrows i am feeling.

-anne

26/05/2023

Top 1,lahat ng sub may achievements ka sa 2nd grading and something happened, you experience trauma's then, during 3rd grading napapansin mong nagiging pabaya kana, nawawalan ng gana and bigayan ng card wla ka manlang kahit isang nakuha wla na ren sa top.

I'm slowly losing motivation, excitement, to study hard, I'm not doing well like i used to, I'm now getting fail marks, and I'm slowly accepting the fact that I'm academically failing.

26/05/2023

Pov: pinagalitan ka sa bagay na hindi naman ikaw ang may kasalanan then you tried explaining yourself your side rather, then sinabihan kang wlang galang kase sumasagot kana and suddenly realized, tatahimik nalang ako, kase sa t'wing ipaglalaban ko ung sarili ko ako lagi yung mali.

26/05/2023

U know, i tried my best naman but why its always ended up having self disappointments, self doubts , and overthinking. Kahit na alam mo sa sarili mong ginawa mo na lahat.Na gu-guilt ka pa rin kase nafee-feel mong naging irresponsible ka, at kulang paden ung ginawa mo. Damn I'm tired ☹️

26/05/2023

POV: WHEN YOU. CAN'T EXPLAIN WHAT'S GOING ON INSIDE YOUR HEAD, BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW EITHER.

26/05/2023

Maybe it sounds so selfish , but sometimes i honestly feel so comfortable when no one's at home. Being left at home while no one's around feel soooo goood, i feel emotionally and mentally safe.

26/05/2023

Listening to everyone in your life call you lazy, but you've just lost your motivation.

26/05/2023

Imagine bigla kang nakatulog while you having a break down, tas hindi kana nagising.

26/05/2023

I USUALLY DEAL WITH MY OWN PROBLEM (THEY CALL THIS DRAMA) ALONE AND I AUTOMATICALLY DISTANCE MYSELF TO EVERYONE ONCE I FEEL LEFT OUT, SAD, AND TIRED FOR SOME REASONS. I DON'T ASK FOR COMFORT, LOVE OR HELP THAT OFTEN, EVEN FROM MY CLOSE FRIEND, FAMILY, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE A BURDEN TO EVERYONE. BESIDES I DON'T KNOW HOW TO ASK FOR HELP. SO I JUST DISAPPEAR AND CRY UNTIL I FIX MYSELF.

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