08/17/2022
Alright my semester is in full swing now, and I just want to make an observation--Leading up to me going back to school, Rustin and I had to reevaluate the way we'd been splitting home responsibilities throughout our marriage--and frankly, it hadn't been working very well.ββββββββ
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When we married (almost 20 years ago!) we came into our relationship both expecting to perpetuate very traditional gender roles. In practice, I don't think that ever worked for us...but man, did we keep trying. Not because it's what we *wanted,* but because we really believed that's what we were *supposed* to do, and frankly, didn't realize we had a choice.ββββββββ
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We finally came to a place where we could see more clearly that it just wasn't working, and he's since taken over menu planning, grocery shopping, cooking dinner, and he handles laundry from washing to folding.ββββββββ
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I can't articulate what a difference it's made in our home atmosphere and in my headspace. Is our house always clean now? No. Is it a perfect system? No. But I no longer feel like I'm allllways dropping the ball on something. I can breathe. I have time to be a person. I won't speak for Rustin in specifics, but I know reevaluating responsibilities has been a major benefit for him, too.ββββββββ
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There is no way I could handle student life if we hadn't thrown those traditional gender-roles out the window and just figured out which of us was better at (and had time for) the 'boomerang jobs' (the ones that keep coming back day after day), that just need done. ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ