12/02/2022
For such simple pictures, these took a lot out of me. I had to pull up some old music. I keep memories in songs. Im not sure why its just what I do, so to feel memories I listen to the songs I listened to at the time that memory happened.
The difference one little pill can make.
Years of trying to fix myself without meds, I knew something was wrong with me but didn't know why I couldn't fix it myself. I just figured it was because im weak.
When I finally began taking them and got a taste if what happiness felt like, what confidence felt like, what calm felt like...I felt like I was someone else. I could see clearly, think clearly, shaking less, making it through the day without feeling like a failure or a burden. This can't be me. This isn't the same me. Who am I now?
Then one day it stopped...
So they added another, then another.
I thought I found a way completely out, but it never goes away. It lives beneath, fighting to get out everyday.
So somedays im not myself. Somedays I still struggle, most days i'm tired. because i'm fighting a fight within myself.
I was where you are right now. I wanted to quit I wanted to give up. Im here to tell you to get on your knees, and when you can lift one leg, then the other till you are standing. You can do this..