12/24/2018
"I was assaulted during my junior year of high school. The day after the assault, I reported it to the school and the administration ended up telling the report to a mutual friend. Word spread around the school which led to me being harassed every day in the hallway. Guys would tape condoms to my locker, consistently slapped my ass whenever I walked down the hall. Every other week I would have the words, ‘whore’, ‘slut’ or ‘good f**k’ written all over my locker with a sharpie. It got so bad that I had to change schools halfway across the country.
In March, two months after I transferred, two of my friends contacted me saying they too were assaulted by the same guy. He was not reported, didn’t get any jail time, and was able to graduate, while I had to uproot my life and leave everything behind.
During my freshman year of college, I met four incredible people named Sam, Nahin, Nina, and Reeve, who decided to start this groundbreaking organization called Pards Against Sexual Assault (PASA). It is a student-led organization on campus. Our goal is to educate students about sexual misconduct and preventative measures to help create a safe campus for all students. We [PASA] have the tools and a lot of students don't know how to use them so we want to show the students on campus how to use those tools. It's as simple as saying ‘Me too’; ‘It happened to me too’.
I wish I would have reached out more; I wish I would have told my parents sooner and trusted my friends a lot more. I feel like with something as serious as sexual misconduct, whether it is somebody touching your bottom or physically attacking you, if you don’t have a good support system already in place on campus or at home, it is only going to lead to so many other negative things in life.
It was through Take Back The Night last November, where I was finally able to come to terms with my assault. It is because of those four incredible people that I am a peer educator, I can share resources that the college provides, I can become a close confidant for other students that want to report their assault.
I’m not gonna lie, the work is not easy, it’s tough. There are days when I wonder if I have the strength to continue doing it and there are other days when I feel on top of the world and I feel so proud that I’m able to do the work that needs to be done on campus. And to essentially create a safer space for students to come forward and report their assault. But it’s also very emotional and I know I’ve only been a member of PASA officially for about four months now, but I can't tell you how many times I’ve just stayed in my room and cried because of the accounts that I’ve gotten and the stories shared by other people on campus. I’ve even had some of my closest friends and people who I’ve barely known to tell me stories about their r**e and assaults, or even just them walking home alone at night and just seeing the guys looking at them like they’re “fresh meat”.
Its okay to be scared because a lot of the times just coming up to one person and sharing your story is such a terrifying moment. But once you do that, I can't speak for other people but for me, it was such an empowering moment and it lifted me from being a victim to becoming a survivor. "