05/13/2026
Long read but it’s like she wrote it from my own heart ❤️🩹 last year was a tough one for me. I’ve not really spoke on it but I’ve been meaning to. Maybe eventually. But shew girl wrote exactly what’s been on my heart heavy.
Hey, friends! I truly have so much to say, but I’m having a hard time finding words. I just want to share my heavy heart with you. I never want you to unfollow me because you think that I’m a negative person or what I post sounds like excuses or whining because I promise, that’s not what I’m trying to do. I’m so blessed, and I’m so grateful for this job. However, this season has been hard. I have been taking photos of the most beautiful people, working at the prettiest venues, and capturing so many incredible moments, but I haven’t had time to show you any of it.
Before I get into that more, I’m going to share something super deep with all of you. I majorly struggle with disappointment and anxiety. I’ve always been a perfectionist to a point that it eats me alive when things aren’t complete in the way my brain tells me they should be. It could be as simple as I felt I needed to brighten up your photo by .5 and I didn’t; therefore, you hate them. If you don’t reply about them, I’m convinced that you’re disappointed or you’re telling people not to use me. Recently, my turn around times have been double what they use to be and that’s just tore me apart. A few years ago, I actually had a client tell a nail salon that she would never use me again because it took me 3 weeks to get her photos back even though I got them back before the event she needed them for. And do you know, she hasn’t booked me again and I’ve thought about that every day since.
I never want to disappoint y’all. I never want you to say, “I will not use her again because she takes forever to get them back”, but right now… that’s just what we’re at. My babies are little, and I’m home with them every day during the week while working all weekend long. I’m stuck somewhere between running off little to no sleep, fixing P&Js and trippin’ over 1000 Toy Story toys, to nursing a baby to sleep while playing a game with my toddler and never wanting to miss a single moment with them all the while I’m itching to edit your beautiful photos. I promise they, and you, are always on my mind.
Before you say, “Well you should start booking yourself better.” I know, but I have a hard time with saying no. I love everyone. I love making new friends and I love seeing old ones. I adore all of my clients and it fills my cup up to capture your memories, so it’s extra hard for me to, again, disappoint you. I also really love to work. I’ve always been a hard worker and I truly enjoy it, so saying no h u r t s. I just want to be there…. For it all… every day.. all the time. I just want you to be your photo girl!
Anyway, I didn’t have to go into all of that, but I feel it’s important to keep it real with y’all. I want to share my heart so you know exactly who I am and where I am. This is me. I’m a real person who is struggling! I want to make you happy. I want you to continue using me for these precious memories. I want to be cool, fun, and happy go lucky with quick turn around times, actively present on social media and ALL the things, but right now…. I’m a mess. I’m a mom fighting for the business I love so much while clinging to every snuggle and giggle with my babies.
With all of that, if you’ve waited or been waiting on photos from me, I’m so sorry. I promise I’m working every day as much as I can. I know it may not seem like it, but my computer is with me as much as my kids. Truly, thank you for being the best clients and sharing kindness and grace as I navigate this season of motherhood and business.
Much love 🤍
Paden
