My life in bites

My life in bites If you are seeing this you are invited to my life story. you were probably a part of it at one time.

This ones a lil long.When I was about 7 it was common for my mom to send me or my brother down to the local corner marke...
04/09/2026

This ones a lil long.

When I was about 7 it was common for my mom to send me or my brother down to the local corner market, (we called it the "little Italian store" because it wasnt racist then), for various things, Milk, bread, etc... even ci******es. We had an account there so we would just say " put it on the account" and mom would settle up later.
Well, you know when you're a kid and you want to be like the cool adults and do things like they do, check this out. My best friend, (we'll call him George) and I decided that we would try smoking! Now all we knew about smoking was you pulled a cigarette out of a pack that you got from a carton, you put a fire of some kind, match, lighter, whatever, and then you sucked on them. It seemed legit and looked pretty cool.
Now we could have probably snatched up a pack lying around one of our homes because EVERYONE smoked back then. But nope, I remember that we had the account at the "little Italian store" so we could acquire our adult transition sticks with no one the wiser. So off we went on our adventure to Coolsville!! It was TOO easy. It would have been logical to just get a pack for my mom, but we went nuclear and got a whole carton. Ten packs of Pall Mall golds, (moms brand so as not to tip our hand) Once we scored we needed to figure out where we could "grow up". George decided that his family's garage would work as his parents were working and no one would ever see us. Upon arriving, we realized that we had NO FIRE!! Oh no, what do we do now? So close but yet so far away.
We searched high and we seached low but to no avail. All we could find was a spark maker for lighting a welder. God knows we tried. We must have struck that thing 500 times. We tried it on the cigarette, we tried paper, we tried everything that we thought would catch fire. NOTHING!!!
Out of frustration we decided we would have to go into the house for the next level of recon. After being in the house for less than a minute, there they were a full box of wooden kitchen matches! More than enough for our quest into maturity. Back to the garage we ran.
It was time. We slowly opened the carton, removed pack number one. I pounded the pack against my hand, ( i had no idea why, I just knew that's how the adults did it), I tugged at the cellophane to gain access to the gleaming gold foil that stood between the cigarette and my entry into Coolsville. George grabbed the pack from me and ripped the foil off and tore into the pack mangling the precious sticks that we knew would set us free of our child hood.
He gave me one and took another for himself. The match was struck, applied to the cigarette. The smoking had begun!
Now we had only seen others smoke and really didn't understand the mechanics of the whole process so we just started puffing. At first we just took a puff into the mouth then blew it out. Pretty cool so far. We did this for the first one, then the next, then the next. We then proceeded to go through 90% of the carton just puffing in and blowing out. About halfway through we started feeling the effect. Lightheaded, nauseous, eyes burning, we did it! We were now cool!
Little did we know, my brother had wandered up to the garage as he saw copious amounts of smoke leaking from the cracked doorway. Peaking through the windows he saw his little brother and his little friend powering through their last smokes and last treatable oxygen.
The first word out of his mouth was a blood curdling "MOM!" as he ran towards our house next door.
We tried to hide the evidence but the damage was done. Not only were there 160+/- butts everywhere, there was still the lingering smell of smoke, and from what I was told, we were quickly turning a very sickly green color.
We were BUSTED!
My mom contacted George's parents and together they decided (after the laughter died down) we were punished enough by the whole green tonged experience. I don't know about George but I never tried smoking again.

My father was the guy that went out for ci******es one day and never came back. I was 2 1/2 when he bounced. This meant ...
04/07/2026

My father was the guy that went out for ci******es one day and never came back. I was 2 1/2 when he bounced. This meant that my family was 1 income short for our little family of 4. So mom did something she hated more than anything. She moved us into my maternal grandmother's home. (More on that surreal experience in future pists). I really had know idea what my father looked like due to my age when he left.
A few years after we moved, a couple of men came to visit our home to see my mom. The man in the passenger seat went into the house, the other just sat in the car smoking a Marlboro and staring at me. Soon the passenger came back and got in the car. The driver flicked his but passed me and they drove away. Many years later I asked my mom if my father would ever come back. She then enlightened me that he had... when I was 6. He and his brother came to borrow money from her. The father never left the car. He sent his brother in to ask for the money while he sat in the car. The driver never said a word. Just glanced at me while they drove off. Still don't remember what he looked like.

So THIS is the actual first memory of my own. when I was a toddler, maybe a tag older, I remember and old man walking b...
03/21/2026

So THIS is the actual first memory of my own. when I was a toddler, maybe a tag older, I remember and old man walking by my house on a semi regular basis. Each time he came by he would always say hello to me. My mother would tell me later in life that he was an actual "Hobo" and that when his rail riding would bring him through our area he would stop by and ask if she needed any handy work done. She would always find something for him to do and pay him a little something as she thought he deserved the same dignity as any other man that worked for what they got. The thing that still resonates with me is that he had a very strong English accent, and i always simply thought he just talked funny.

Can you dial in on your earliest memory? I'd like to hear it.

Albeit I personally do not remember this moment, my mother told me that my lungs were not at their best as a baby so sh...
03/21/2026

Albeit I personally do not remember this moment, my mother told me that my lungs were not at their best as a baby so she was to put me outside (it's mid winter), and it would help my lungs grow stronger.
After a few time a out there, a neighborhood squirrel that was either late for hibernation or just not doing it at all started to visit me. No treats, no bargaining, nothing. He apparently enjoyed my company. The odd part was that he would not go near anyone else and actually would charge at people that would try to collect me from the vast tundra. He was my first friend and again, although I don't remember him, my mom swears by the story.

03/21/2026

Congratulations! you're about to get an inside look at my life! I'll be posting stories that date back to my earliest memories (think toddler tantrums and questionable fashion sense) to what might have happened last week. Trust me its been a wild ride to date.
Some of you might see yourselves in these tales, so don't get any ideas about stalking me. I promise not to use your real name without your explicit consent. These stories will probably be all over the place chronologically, but I'll attempt to add dates when relevant.

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45th And 5th
New York, NY

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