Vixen Photography

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A little bit about me .......

Sooooo this was shared on my closed Bo***ir group, but I've had several people ask if I would share it publicly because they have a loved one that it would really help. It is HARD to post. In the closed group it still felt concealed , and that it wouldn't really " be out there " . It's hard to let go . It's hard to open up and let people really see me. But I do think this story would help others push toward their dreams. So here goes.......

A bit about the photographer : So during shoots I talk . It puts you at ease, takes your mind off what you are doing , and often you relate and a bond is made. It's hard to be nervous when your laughing your ass off 😂 sooo many times people tell me I should right a book. But , if you knew my story , you would know how difficult that would be. After posting a fraction of my story in a woman's group, I've decided to post here as well. It's a long ass story, so just scroll past if you like. No hard feelings ! And this is just a fraction of the full story .......

Ok, here is a short- not so short version of a long story. Ha. My parents were like hippy/ gypsies , never stayed in the same spot. Was afraid of the government , and when I was born you weren't automatically given a social security number, the parents had to go apply for it . Well my parents never did . We never lived in the same spot longer then a year. Sometimes just a couple weeks. I was never taken to the dr ( and I've never had any shots, so I have a very low immune system 😞 ) or the dentist , and my parents never did taxes so I wasn't a dependent. We also never visited family or had friends. So I actually never existed . I could have died and no one would really know . My parents made wood signs and sold them at flea markets. A different one every week . So people didn't really know us, and if anyone questioned why I was out of school they just replied I was home schooled . I learned to read at about 12. I was put in a private school at the age of 12 ( a joke really, it was a house run by retired teachers ) they didn't test my grade level , just stuck me a year behind where I was supposed to be . I remember the first test grade I ever got. It was a 67. I thought that was AMAZING because I thought a bad grade was like 5-6 🤦🏻‍♀️ I was only there about 3 months and the took me out . My parents bought school book off and on for me to work, but they never watched me, or graded the books, so what's the point 🤷🏻‍♀️ for some reason they put me back in the same school again at 14. 7th grade. You had to wear uniforms , and we were very poor, so I only got one uniform. And at the time we lived in a closed gas station and didn't have a washer or drier. And they only went to a laundry mat about 4 times a year . So in no time my uniform was sweat stained and gross. Plus we didn't have a bathtub or shower in the gas station . The kids were cruel with the exception of three girls . One of which I'm still friends with on FB. I was so nerves going to school almost every day before school I would throw up. To this day if I get up real early , I feel sick to the stomach . I didn't grasp what the teacher was saying, and couldn't read fast enough to keep up, so I would take all my books home everyday and figure out the following days work so I could be done the same time as other kids. I still kept an A-B average. I only got to attend about 4 months and my parents took me out again. Never to go to another school again. By this time we had moved into an old B-B-Q stand that was about 8'x12' and didn't have lights for about a month and no water for about 2 months. I remember using a crimp iron to " fry " the grease out of my hair since it had been months since I showered . I had ladies stop me and ask how long my hair would last like that and I would say a couple weeks ( not thinking most people shower everyday) and they would say WOW how can it last like that ?! ( oops ) We ended up moving many more times, homeless a few times . I spent my 18th birthday living in a van with my parents and our dog. We ended up renting a house from a 54 year old man, that took a liking to my parents and would let them be late on rent. I ended up helping him clean rent houses and doing little jobs for him because his health wasn't the greatest. He started getting flirty , and I never had a person show interest before other them this boy I really loved at 16. But my parents stopped going to their church and the guys parents made him brake up with me. So any way. This 54 year old man ended up being my first kiss. 6 months later I at 19 married a man 36 years older them me. My parents liked him, and liked the fact that they didn't have to pay rent anymore. I ended up getting pregnant a week after getting married. Then he told me he didn't want me and only wanted me because I was a virgin, and he never had one before. But we were to different. So he took me to my parents and they said they couldn't afford me, and he married me, he needs to handle it. Yeeeeeaaah . That was a fun trip. I ended up giving birth to a beautiful little 7 pound girl BREECH , butt first , folded in half , on our bathroom floor with no one there but my husband. That actually brought us close together. We were happy for a while . Ended up having 3 more children. But he was always verbally abusive. Always told me I was stupid , and was poor and would always be poor and couldn't do anything for myself. I wasn't allowed to have a phone, drive a car, or have a computer till after my children were born. I wasn't allowed to wear lingerie. He said it was for wh**es , not wives. I actually learned how to print the alphabet helping my daughter do kindergarten work . My mom had always taught me cursive. It wasn't until I was at a MOMS group , when I realized I didn't wright correctly. when I wrote something and they made fun of me because some of the letters were capital , some little, some kinda cursive. After the birth of my 4th child , just before my 30th birthday I got real depressed . I wasn't happy and was getting old. My sister had run away when I was 9 . ( she was 17) and when I was like 28 we found each other. Since we didn't have a sisterhood, one day she was in my kitchen and said she wanted to do something sisterly . So we decided to put a blond steak in our hair. My husband heard that and said my childhood was over and I wasn't allowed to do that. Pi**ed and felling like I didn't give a s**t what he said , we headed to tyler and each got a pea size heart tattoo on our ankle. Two weeks later my husband found out and started threatening to kill me. Like FOR REAL. Said I was turning to trash , and after his passing I was going to turn into a w***e . ( even though I'm very faithful and had still only had ever kissed him. He said he rather our kids grow up without a mother, then for me to be laid up under some dick and our kids get r***d or murdered . After that I was done . I left . My church and sister helped me get a rent house , and after 3 months of being along and scared , it was my sisters idea to get on a chat line and talk to people. I talked to 3 different guys who all ended up being weirdos. Then I met a man in Louisiana. His info page was well wrote, and old fashioned. Plus he was 8 months younger then me. After a few days of weighting back and forth, we spoke on the phone. HOLY CRAP HIS VOICE WAS AMAZING. Deep , gentleman like. Intelligent . We hit it off immediately . He had a rough life too and understood mine. After just 3 weeks I drove down to meet him. A month after that , the day after my official divorce he moved in, and we were married a year later ❤️ we since have had two kids together and have all six kids that he treats all like his own. November will be 7 years together. After I had left my husband and was newly remarried , I had never really had a job , so I became a waitress and my new husband was recently out of the army and stayed at home with my small kids. I waitressed for 3 years and then decided to try my hand at photography. I had had so,e bo***ir pictures taken for my new husband, and was disappointed in the outcome. Although a female took my pictures , her husband friend requested me the day after , and I felt totally ashamed and and dirty. Plus there wasn't anything special about them. I had a friend getting married , and asked me to do hers, and they turned out better then ( with my iPhone ) then the shoot I received. Fast forward three years , and we bought a house that had a guest house. Tired of working 50 hours a week waitressing, and missing my family . I decided to try my hand at photography. Even though I had never even owned a " real " camera , it was my passion, and my husband was supportive . So I took our tax return and bought all I need and used our guest house to start a bo***ir " studio " After just two months, I was able to quit waiting tables altogether and had my calendar booked up with photo shoots ! Now three years later I've had over 2,000 clients and have an amazing 4,000 sq ft studio in jacksonville! Blessed beyond Imagine. It was t easy though. Lots of trial and error. Lots of haters trying their best to keep my doors closed. Many tears . Many prayers. And hard manual labor getting my studio where it is today. I'm still bashed even today for the way I do things with my business. Not charging enough, charging to much, not knowing the technical terms or photography, not going to school for photography ( that's a joke. Like why should I since I didn't even go to real school 😂😂) My business is only possible because of all my amazing clients . Without their encouragement and support I would never be where I am today. I don't ever take it for granted . Not one day. I walk into my studio and cry sometimes. I'm been homeless, gone two days without eating , 4 months with only one shower, and now I have a 4K ft home and 4K ft studio. It blowed my mind the I DID THIS. If I can do this with 0 education , 0 photography training , and 0 knowledge of what the hell im doing , then anyone can follow their dream and succeed . Don't ever give up, and give it all you have.

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