05/04/2026
Brought Gwen in to see Bodie today and he dropped everything and put his arms out to hold his baby sister. They love each other so much and it breaks my heart that they can’t be together right now.
This past week has been so emotionally taxing. Rushing to the ER and having Bodie be in the PICU were the absolute worst and scariest days of my life. As we were going through his leukemia treatment no part of it was fun, but I would always think “at least we’re not there. It could be worse.” And it did get worse.
I’m so thankful that Bodie is here and alive. I’m dreading the long fight he still has ahead of him. I’m absolutely terrified to put his body through another round of intense chemo.
It clearly took its toll on his little body.
I’m so scared of what is ahead. I hate that he has leukemia. I hate everything he has to deal with at only 3 years old. I despise it with every fiber in my being.
I was just starting to be like “He’s got this. He will make it through.” But now I’m terrified.
The past few days his body has basically been continuously fevering. Coming and going all day. He starts to not feel well and hey let’s pop this med in him. So many meds. And I hate it. But there’s nothing I can do about it.
I want to be past this so badly, but my goodness we’re only 2 months into this. And years of treatment ahead.
I’m exhausted. I’m exhausted for my little boy.
Psalm 13 ~
“How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,” lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken. But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.“
Want to help support Bodie’s fight against leukemia? The link to donate is in my bio❤️🩹